October 2011
1 post
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I made coconut and chocolate slice and so can you
For the longest time I had an irrational dislike for Bill Granger, the blonde haired, ultra white toothed, v-neck t-shirt wearing Australian cook. I maintained this dislike through several enjoyable visits to his eponymous breakfast themed restaurant in Surry Hills. He seemed a little grating, perhaps. The sort of early rising type that has a nine hour ocean swim before grabbing a quick soy latte...
September 2011
1 post
3 tags
I made spag bol and so can you
Spaghetti bolognese is a dish tied to memory. As a kid I remember one of my favourite meals was the rich beefy, garlicky, and tomatoey sauce over playfully yellow spaghetti. Now as a bigger kid, my appreciation for the dish only grows. And of course, all the versions I make only seem to pale in comparison to the memory of dear old Mum’s.
It is almost a painful cliche of food writing that...
March 2011
1 post
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I made chicken noodle soup and so can you
Your body is a battlefield. Instead of explosions and gunshots, however, cells burst and are consumed by other cells. It would be very exciting if our eyes had one of those magnifying wheels like on microscopes. But alas, we are denied that one small pleasure and instead must suffer. Head stuffy, joints achey, throat inflamed and tender. Being sick is no fun. However, we must not concede the...
February 2011
2 posts
2 tags
I made these apple cinnamon muffins and so can you →
3 tags
I made bircher muesli and so can you
My problem with cereal is the crunch crunch. Mornings should be quiet dignified times, not bite sized moments of carnivale. This is why I traditionally gravitate away from the medically approved bowl of frosted sugar flakes and towards other options, perhaps a lightly toasted piece of bread with hummus and fresh slices of tomato, or yellow clouds of scrambled eggs.
Every few months I am...
October 2010
1 post
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I made roast broccolini and so can you
Roasting is this culinary magic trick that makes everything taste fantastic. I’d like to try a roast roast chicken, I think that would be amazing.
Take a bunch of a vegetable. In this case broccolini, which is a cross between broccoli and Mussolini. Don’t wash it, but just rub the dirt and bits off. You could wash it but then you have to dry it and who has time?
Throw on a baking...
September 2010
1 post
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I made sangria and so can you
⁄¡Olé! Firstly, to disappoint you—the best writing trick I know, disappoint the reader as soon as possible—this is about white sangria. This is due to a longstanding dislike for red wine on the part of my co-consumer.
You’ll need some sort of solid storage container, ideally a jug. It doesn’t have to be venetian crystal, but honestly, life is too short. We used something even better:...
June 2010
3 posts
3 tags
I made pavlova and so can you
Pavlova, fluffy and crispy and with insides that tastes like how I imagine clouds would taste like. Of course being the reasonably mature chap that I am, I know clouds would disappoint. Like snow. One always imagines snow as being fluffy essentially temperature neutral powder. Instead it is this cold crunchy stuff. How life disappoints!
On with the cooking! So, assemble the ingredients listed...
3 tags
I made a fried egg sandwich and so can you
My normal fried egg sandwich consists of egg, bread (duh to both), rooster, some ketchup and a few dashes of worcestershire sauce. As you know, I’m a saucy fellow.
Today I tried something different. The key, regardless of other decision, is a a well fried egg, complete with a lacy skirt and a somewhat cooked yolk. I normally hate well cooked eggs—concrete scrambled eggs and...
3 tags
I made a reuben sandwich and so can you
Sandwiches are art. There is no other way to describe it. They are the king of food types, the emperor of cuisine choice, the sultan of substantial food. I have estimated that in the past week alone I have eaten at least twenty sandwiches. While a salad or pasta dish is naturally restricted to one or two meal times only, sandwiches are forever. I would be comfortable with a sandwich for breakfast,...
May 2010
6 posts
3 tags
I made fried chickpeas and so can you
This dish was fun. It was also the first time I’ve ever heard someone say “wowee” over the humble chickpea. Fun fact: the ‘great’ statesman and renowned spoil sport Cicero was so-called because his ancestor’s nose had a growth on it that resembled a cicer (latin for chickpea). Find an ancient historian if they prefer Chickpea or Julius and you’ll get the...
3 tags
I made smashed cucumbers and so can you
If you want to impress someone you could call them pai huang gua.
I never used to like cucumbers or pickles for that matter. But one brave day I actually ate the token cheeseburger pickle as opposed to flinging it away like a leprous insult. And from there I embraced all things pickled. How could you not—crispy, vinegarie, gorgeous. Eventually I started to like cucumbers, through the...
4 tags
I made raspberry sauce and so can you
What ho! A break from the assault of the forces of the tomato, garlic and chilli.
I have strayed from the ingredients, but not the colour. This sauce is a lovely and cheerful red colour. It goes well with something white, like vanilla ice cream or a crisp shirt.
It is super easy. Whack frozen raspberries—the lazy berry, so called for its use in Masterchef by every contestant whenever...
5 tags
I made sausage pasta and so can you
Not all sausages are made equal. Some are made to throw on a bbq, where the char will improve the taste of sawdust and snout. Some are made to be venerated upon a a fluffy cloud of mashed potatoes. The sausages left in our freezer, awaiting some unknown dire situation where eating them would become an acceptable choice, were of the first type.
As we all know, pasta makes everything better. So,...
4 tags
I made pizza and so can you
My first experince with ‘home made’ pizzas was in cooking classes during high school. We were given trays containing carefully allocated ingredients: some ham, a piece of pineapple and a shallot. Instead of a base we used a split english muffin. A friend and I were particularly haute in our cuisine and sprinkled some oregano and chilli flakes over our ‘pizzas’. They were...
April 2010
4 posts
2 tags
I made promises and so can you
Does the internet really need another food blog? No. However, here I am, so I guess the internet will have to learn to share. Take that, internet. I bet if the internet was in Animal Farm it’d be an unlovable character like a skunk. A big fat greedy skunk.
I feel compelled to outline some general principles about IMF. Boy, doesn’t that sound exciting! I bet whoever wrote this thing is...
4 tags
I made avocado toast and so can you
This was a moment where I realised supermarket tomatoes are sent by the tomato god—Italian Jesus?—to merely mock us. Even the ‘truss’ tomatoes, with their little green headgear. They may look the look, but they don’t taste the taste.
Today’s breakfast was simple. And meant to be delicious.
Toasted seedy bread. The more seeds the better, until you reach the stage where...
4 tags
I made brussels sprouts and so can you
Brussels sprouts have a miniature vegetable appeal. It makes you feel like a giant, just like giant brussels sprouts would make you feel like a dwarf.
I chopped off the little bottom bits and plonked them into a bowl of water, inviting all the little hiding insects to float away. Then! You make thin little bacon ribbons. You toss the bacon into your still much loved new sauté pan. It’s...
4 tags
I made tomato sauce and so can you
Take a few cans of tomatoes. Use fancy ones, use italian ones, use fancy italian ones, or use whatever is cheap at the supermarket. Italian Jesus will not smite you for using inferior tomatoes, at least not on a Sunday. I like chunky crushed, but if you really want to you can use whole tomatoes and crush them yourself. Doesn’t that sound fun, smooshing tomatoes and getting juice all over...
4 tags
I made eggs and so can you
Fry some onion, garlic. Sprinkle some cumin, then add some sliced salami and tomato. Fry for a little more. Add a few leaves of shredded Basil. Break two eggs into a bowl, add some s&p, a dash of milk if you like, then whisk a little with a fork. Add eggs to fry pan. Wait till semi-set, then jiggle about. Cook, but don’t over cook.
Meanwhile, toast an english muffin, make a cup of tea. Butter...